Finding myself

Well since I last wrote we have done a lot of things here.  We went for a trip to the mountains which was an unexpected trip.  Our friends came over and picked us up on a Friday morning and we thought we would just be gone a couple of hours to go get some food in an adjacent town.  Little did we know we were gone 12 hours, not what we expected I’ll say that.  However, it should be stated that we had the most fun.  I am a person who likes to plan things and since I’ve been here almost everything been unplanned.  I do like to fly by the seat of my pants from time to time but it’s like when my mother visits, we will have the day planned out to start.  Will it go as planned? Most likely not and that’s the fun part but at least we start out with a vision in mind.  I’m still struggling to find myself after many years of being beaten down in jobs and treated horribly.  I did cut most of my ties with Albuquerque and I’m finding great solace in that.  Every day I start my day by reading my tarot cards.  This accomplishes two things, first it lets me know where I am for the day and sometimes what to expect.  Secondly it helps me get in tuned with my cards so that when I read them for others I can get an accurate reading.  This is something that I’ve done for a while but over the past few years I haven’t touched a card until I moved here.  I’m putting together my tarot book as well so I’m spending a lot of time online researching the meanings as I’ve forgotten most of them since I haven’t read for years.  It’s interesting though, the cards I read are blank cards with only the name of the card written on them, yet they are so very accurate in describing the situation and pointing out areas where I’m struggling.  To boil it down I’ve been soul searching, attacking the very things that have hindered me for many years.  It’s allowing me to see that some of the things that happened to me years ago are still under the surface and slowly I’m bringing them up to deal with them.  They are even pointing out things that I didn’t really have a clue I was still carrying with me.  Anyway I’m finding it beneficial in reading my cards daily.

It was really serene to get out of town and it was a bit exciting, a change of pace.  Mbarek had been sick and even though he was getting over the respiratory infection he wanted to go so we did.  We started out by taking a tour around a small lake just west of town, it was beautiful.  Then we went on down the road and started through the mountains.  The roads were very narrow, some broken, twisty, curvy and even hairpins.  Now I don’t know about you but being in a car on these types of roads makes it very difficult to sit still.  The constant motion of side to side, throwing on the breaks and bumpy roads were just almost too much, kinda like a roller coaster and the spider combined.  Although the roads were no different than most mountain roads it was different.  The rolling hills, valleys of olive vineyards, the colors of the clover and yellow flowers was breathtaking.  I didn’t take photos because sitting in the back seat didn’t offer much of a vantage point through the dark tinted windows.  The car that we were in didn’t have much of a suspension system because it was a rocky ride and that in itself made it difficult to keep a camera focused.  Yes, Mbarek got motion sickness, poor thing and well Butch I had to hold him most of the way.  We stopped a lot along the road and would jump out and take photos.  The first place we actually pulled off the road was beautiful.  I was in awe of the daisy’s.  I just love daisy’s they are the happiest flower.  If you are in a bad mood a daisy will just brighten your day.  I took most of my photos of the flowers while I was smiling back and yes I did talk to them to tell them how pretty they were.  The view from this vantage point was ethereal.  I’ve been in the mountains a lot in my life but these were just different, just what you would think of being in Africa in the mountains.  Along the way we ran into several people walking on the road in sets of 3’s.  I wondered what they were doing out on the road in the middle of nowhere when Mbarek told me they were forest patrol.  It was interesting to see them out just walking along the roads.  Evidently they have to patrol like this to keep people from cutting down the trees and selling them for fire wood.

In the area we were the people did have electricity but didn’t have water.  I know this because we rounded the corner and down in this little gully was a man and woman with a donkey.  The donkey had water jugs strapped over its back and they were filling them manually from a well.  A well that was operated by a pulley system and bucket.  We stopped and filled our water bottle and the water was so good.  We drove and drove, we encountered a sheep herd that was crossing our path.  I tried to video that but when I hit the record button I didn’t hit it really so nothing recorded.  It would have been a great video.  As we were riding I thought about things.  I was vegan for a year and a vegetarian for two years before that.  I always had an issue with eating meat because of the way it’s raised.  I mean chickens are not free range like it sounds.  Cows headed to the slaughter house have been at a fat farm for month at a time knee deep in their own shit and inoculated with God knows what to keep them from infection.  And to top that who knows what in the hell is actually in the feed.  Well I know what’s in it but that is one soap box for another time.  As I’m riding I’m seeing animals just roaming the fields and grazing.  They are free to run or walk or sleep.  The little lambs are running or suckling and they look very happy.  Actually they are very very happy.  Nothing could have brought a smile to my face than knowing the meat that I eat here is raised as God intended.  Nothing could have made me happier than seeing these animals live a wonderful life just grazing on the land and doing what is natural.  The one thing you don’t see here is farm fences.  There were no fences or barns anywhere just land unobstructed and it was beautiful.  There actually were very few houses along the way and the ones I saw were old mostly made from rock.  There were no mansions and I have to say it felt as if time stood still and had for many many years.

We made our way to a look out that had a defined pull off area, we stopped for a while there taking photos.  You could see the road winding behind us on the hillside it was, again, just beautiful.  After staying a while we moved on and went to a small town to have lunch.  We dined on grilled lamb and hamburger kabobs cooked on the grill yum yum yum.  The amazing smells of food is overwhelming when you go through these Moroccan towns, you just want to stop and eat at every place.  It’s incredible how good everything smells when you are riding by.  So then it was back in the car headed to the waterfall.  We winded around up and down then finally reached this very tiny village.  In the middle of the village, that was built on the side of a mountain, was a bustling river.  The water was very clear and blue, it smelled wonderfully.  There were all of these little hut like structures and as you got closer to the waterfall area there were more.  We parked and took off walking up the hill.  There were many people there and little gift shops like the little huts we had seen.  The closer to the steps of the waterfall the more places there were.  All the while the sound of the waterfall was a bound.  We paid $1.00 for tea in one of the little huts where we sat/layed on the floor with nice pillows and it was awesome.  The children were watching us because here I am with all this blonde hair and my arms were exposed, they don’t see that every day I was told.  Also we had Butch so they liked him too.  We took many photos that you will see below, check them out.  We didn’t go to the waterfall because it was a lot farther away and we didn’t have the shoes.  I wish our friends would have told us to wear better shoes because the photos of the waterfall were breathtaking.  We will be going back because I spied a spot for tea.  This spot was in a tree over the river where people were having tea and relaxing with pillows over the water.  Amazing place.  We had a long ride home and it was a very long ride 2 ½ hours away.  When we finally made it to the freeway in Meknes the men sang us acapella Berber songs for the remaining trek home.  My husband was singing to me….  What can I say I loved it.

For all the times I think I’m bored in the town I live in I realize that I’m not really.  I’m doing exactly what I said I wanted to do.  I don’t wear a watch, I don’t work, I can go on a trip in minutes notice because every day is open for anything.  I think I’m really finding myself.  I am homesick though but as my cards have indicated, I can fight it and be stubborn (which is what I’ve been doing), I can go back home (naah)  or I can surrender.  The answer to that is I surrender.  There is so much beauty here both in my home and outside.  It would be a shame to not see it, to go back home, to give up.  I’m gonna stay and for a long time, or as long as they will let me.  Until next time…




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